12. Studyin's killing me!
Monday, November 5, 2007
Its gonna be a long post. I need to rant i guess and also cuz ru's bugging me to update... haha lets get my thoughts out so i dont have to keep repeating myself to my lovely pals... =D Many of these things i havent even shared with my closest pals but well, i've come to a point where i really dont care about how others think about me. And also cuz the people i dont want to read my blog dont have the link to this new one. Be it for good or bad, better or worse, this is me and how i think. At least until God someone strikes a chord with my spirit to overcome my thickheadedness. And if you think nagging and scolding can persuade me even the least bit, well you can try... So ya, here's the synopsis, alot of my good pals have been asking what do i have in mind if i really do fail A levels. My answer is still the same, God hasnt told me what he wants me to do yet. My most current plan is to try to enter OCS during army and own the course. But ya if u want to know what i've been thinking of doing in the longer run... Here goes!
I've always wanted to set up my own business, yup, since lower secondary when i led different teams that were undefeated year after year for any fund raising event. I already know where to get magic supplies from wholesalers and i can message the top yoyo companies just as easily. Unless God tells me otherwise, i'll probably set up a magic and yoyo shop at 201 or near church. 201 makes better sense with a higher traffic volume but location doesnt really matter as there are only like 3 other magic shops in singapore and i'll be the only one in the east. But i think i'll prefer a shop nearer to church, though its quite a ghost town there, the close proximity means i can help out with church stuffs when i have nothing to do. All i need is a laptop and i also can pursue my hobbies of web, graphic and video editing...
Radical idea? Well perhaps to most people in pragmatic singapore who have seen how their friends and relatives suffer without a uni degree, or a masters for that matter. But try as i might, i really really really hate studying. Gosh i force myself until damn jia lat and yet i know it still wont be enuf to compete with those siao lang muggers who can study from day till nite as easily as eating rice. I really really dont wanna go university, with my a lvl results, i doubt i can get into a local uni on credit. There's quite a high possibility of it being so bad an appeal with my exemplary cca record wont lend much help.
Scared? Nah. I and say that without hesitation. There was a time when shauny was damned scared god will call him into full time ministry or send him to Africa. Yep i had this really really huge fear of that. Over time, he helped me gradually warm up such "wacky ideas". Yep i'm still kinda scared of going overseas but i'm more receptive to it. When i hear how Pastor Seaward lives a life of not drawing a salary and pledge such crazy amount of money by faith, i'm like wow... That is the kinda life boy, but its too crazy for me to dare to undertake. Perhaps he's calling me to a job not in the corporate, perhaps not, i dont know... All i know is that i'm giving close to 90% of my all in trying to studying for A lvls. For many of you guys, even my best is in pale comparison to what you guys are capable of doing. But as long as i know i try my best and withdraw to chill every once in a while, i'm at peace with myself. Yep, my best may not be enuf to you guys, but to me as long as i've given my all, i'm satisfied. I cant possibly push beyond my limit without being given the feeling that its okay to be human and that i would be still cherished as much even if i fail.
Oh ya did i mention that i really do wanna work towards taking home the world champion magician title? Well the only first place i ever won at a contest in my life is a scrabble competition in secondary school. The rest of life i've been second or third. I'm so sick of all the silver and bronze trophies in the cabinet grrr... But well, this is something i believe is attainable. And with that title, one would possess a greater power (perhaps in attracting sponsors), to endeavour in doing charity or volunteer work. World Yoyo champion maybe pretty impossible as talent is quite crucial, but in magic the trick is just the minor part of the act. It is the personality of the magician that makes it. Someone once said, "If your audience does not tell you that you are the best magician they have ever seen, then u havent dont your job". I'm nowhere near there, but i'll work towards that. And Chinyee, perhaps i can help you find your magician doctor on the world circuit. =D
I've always wanted to set up my own business, yup, since lower secondary when i led different teams that were undefeated year after year for any fund raising event. I already know where to get magic supplies from wholesalers and i can message the top yoyo companies just as easily. Unless God tells me otherwise, i'll probably set up a magic and yoyo shop at 201 or near church. 201 makes better sense with a higher traffic volume but location doesnt really matter as there are only like 3 other magic shops in singapore and i'll be the only one in the east. But i think i'll prefer a shop nearer to church, though its quite a ghost town there, the close proximity means i can help out with church stuffs when i have nothing to do. All i need is a laptop and i also can pursue my hobbies of web, graphic and video editing...
Radical idea? Well perhaps to most people in pragmatic singapore who have seen how their friends and relatives suffer without a uni degree, or a masters for that matter. But try as i might, i really really really hate studying. Gosh i force myself until damn jia lat and yet i know it still wont be enuf to compete with those siao lang muggers who can study from day till nite as easily as eating rice. I really really dont wanna go university, with my a lvl results, i doubt i can get into a local uni on credit. There's quite a high possibility of it being so bad an appeal with my exemplary cca record wont lend much help.
Scared? Nah. I and say that without hesitation. There was a time when shauny was damned scared god will call him into full time ministry or send him to Africa. Yep i had this really really huge fear of that. Over time, he helped me gradually warm up such "wacky ideas". Yep i'm still kinda scared of going overseas but i'm more receptive to it. When i hear how Pastor Seaward lives a life of not drawing a salary and pledge such crazy amount of money by faith, i'm like wow... That is the kinda life boy, but its too crazy for me to dare to undertake. Perhaps he's calling me to a job not in the corporate, perhaps not, i dont know... All i know is that i'm giving close to 90% of my all in trying to studying for A lvls. For many of you guys, even my best is in pale comparison to what you guys are capable of doing. But as long as i know i try my best and withdraw to chill every once in a while, i'm at peace with myself. Yep, my best may not be enuf to you guys, but to me as long as i've given my all, i'm satisfied. I cant possibly push beyond my limit without being given the feeling that its okay to be human and that i would be still cherished as much even if i fail.
Oh ya did i mention that i really do wanna work towards taking home the world champion magician title? Well the only first place i ever won at a contest in my life is a scrabble competition in secondary school. The rest of life i've been second or third. I'm so sick of all the silver and bronze trophies in the cabinet grrr... But well, this is something i believe is attainable. And with that title, one would possess a greater power (perhaps in attracting sponsors), to endeavour in doing charity or volunteer work. World Yoyo champion maybe pretty impossible as talent is quite crucial, but in magic the trick is just the minor part of the act. It is the personality of the magician that makes it. Someone once said, "If your audience does not tell you that you are the best magician they have ever seen, then u havent dont your job". I'm nowhere near there, but i'll work towards that. And Chinyee, perhaps i can help you find your magician doctor on the world circuit. =D
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